Is being born gay Curable?
Psychologists and psychiatrists have been going through this kind of stuff for years. Whether someone is gay because of their nature or nurture--or both--is unimportant. You can't "make" someone gay no more than you can "make" someone straight. Of course environmental factors affect our sexuality. But if you start trying to set this standard of "OK, let's get rid of the alcoholic father and see what happens" or "Let's make sure he has plenty of girls around him" or "Let's make sure we don't let him play with dolls" or "Let's make sure he gets plenty of love from his dad," then you start trying to come up with a cause for homosexuality, and the fact is, as soon as you meet someone who says, "My father wasn't affectionate with me, so I think that's why I'm gay," then you will meet someone else who will say, "I had a wonderful relationship with my dad growing up, and I'm still gay." You just can't generalize these types of things. Ultimately what you end up doing is trying to figure out how to stop it--like it's a disease or something--instead of trying to help people ACCEPT themselves for who they are and help nurture them into healthy relationships.
Sexuality is such a complicated issue. You're not going to come up with a simple "fix-it" solution for this, which seems to be what you're implying.
For what it's worth, I have an alcoholic father who was always affectionate with me growing up, although he certainly wasn't the best role model. My mother was more nurturing in that respect. Still, I never felt like I was unloved. One of my closest friends has a very close relationship with his father yet a turbulent one with his mother. And yet another friend of mine--actually a former friend--has always had a wonderful relationship with both parents growing up. And we all ended up gay!
You see the problem we have is; we are trying first to find a cure without knowing the cause. Until we do it just doesn't matter "why". I don't think we choose to be gay, we just are (for what ever reason). I would have to ask, if gayness is environmental then shouldn't all siblings either be gay or straight? Why would one or two of a family be gay and the rest striaght? What if we found that all gayness was caused by our environment. Then what? If we choose to still be gay, shouldn't that be allowed? If the cause was from environment then it seems only babies could be "cured." But I am not arguing the cause because we just don't know.
If one is "seeking the love of a man because one never received love from his father" then he needs counseling ONLY if he is unhappy with his life. If he is happy why worry about it? Just to change him? Just to make him straight? That doesn't make any sense to me. However, I don't feel that all these "excuses" people come up with are legitimate. We should be allowed to "be" and not have to "be" enabled to choose a less biased orientation. There should be no "less biased" orientations. In that belief is where the problem lies. It shouldn't matter our orientation. It should matter that we live our lives to the fullest, to be our best and to be happy.
Psychologists and psychiatrists have been going through this kind of stuff for years. Whether someone is gay because of their nature or nurture--or both--is unimportant. You can't "make" someone gay no more than you can "make" someone straight. Of course environmental factors affect our sexuality. But if you start trying to set this standard of "OK, let's get rid of the alcoholic father and see what happens" or "Let's make sure he has plenty of girls around him" or "Let's make sure we don't let him play with dolls" or "Let's make sure he gets plenty of love from his dad," then you start trying to come up with a cause for homosexuality, and the fact is, as soon as you meet someone who says, "My father wasn't affectionate with me, so I think that's why I'm gay," then you will meet someone else who will say, "I had a wonderful relationship with my dad growing up, and I'm still gay." You just can't generalize these types of things. Ultimately what you end up doing is trying to figure out how to stop it--like it's a disease or something--instead of trying to help people ACCEPT themselves for who they are and help nurture them into healthy relationships.
Sexuality is such a complicated issue. You're not going to come up with a simple "fix-it" solution for this, which seems to be what you're implying.
For what it's worth, I have an alcoholic father who was always affectionate with me growing up, although he certainly wasn't the best role model. My mother was more nurturing in that respect. Still, I never felt like I was unloved. One of my closest friends has a very close relationship with his father yet a turbulent one with his mother. And yet another friend of mine--actually a former friend--has always had a wonderful relationship with both parents growing up. And we all ended up gay!
You see the problem we have is; we are trying first to find a cure without knowing the cause. Until we do it just doesn't matter "why". I don't think we choose to be gay, we just are (for what ever reason). I would have to ask, if gayness is environmental then shouldn't all siblings either be gay or straight? Why would one or two of a family be gay and the rest striaght? What if we found that all gayness was caused by our environment. Then what? If we choose to still be gay, shouldn't that be allowed? If the cause was from environment then it seems only babies could be "cured." But I am not arguing the cause because we just don't know.
If one is "seeking the love of a man because one never received love from his father" then he needs counseling ONLY if he is unhappy with his life. If he is happy why worry about it? Just to change him? Just to make him straight? That doesn't make any sense to me. However, I don't feel that all these "excuses" people come up with are legitimate. We should be allowed to "be" and not have to "be" enabled to choose a less biased orientation. There should be no "less biased" orientations. In that belief is where the problem lies. It shouldn't matter our orientation. It should matter that we live our lives to the fullest, to be our best and to be happy.
people are born as they are
ReplyDeletegay, straight, bi non sexual
I say live and let live it is about time!
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